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STR8BLOGGIN » Blog Archive » The Vice Guide to having a crush

The Vice Guide to having a crush

Read the Vice Guide to having a crush. Example:

After masturbating about her 16 times, she is basically your girlfriend (in your head). Therefore, the next time you see her you’ll be all laid-back and casual, touching her shoulder and saying, “What’s going on?” in a relaxed, long-term boyfriend kind of way. How could you be uncomfortable around a woman who, just last night, was on her knees in white high heels and turquoise socks BEGGING to feel your cum in her mouth (with Béatrice Dalle tied up behind her, masturbating).

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