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STR8BLOGGIN » Things that are scorned

Archive for the 'Things that are scorned' Category

Picture this!

Monday, January 9th, 2006

Brokeback Mountain, but starring Robert Redford and Paul Newman. EwwWWWwWwWwwww!!!

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Deep highly racist thought

Saturday, November 5th, 2005

Can Muslims live anywhere without turning it to shit?

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My new homepage

Monday, September 19th, 2005

I made Miami Craigslist Missed Connections my browser homepage. It’s so interesting to see these losers whine about how they would “love to ask you out (but couldn’t because..).” We’ve all been there, that “window of opportunity” that closes just before you could take it cuz you were busy pretending to be really interested in your scrambled eggs. Or hiding behind magazine rack in abject horror because you finally met the girl/guy/puppy of your dreams and you’re wearing these really old short shorts that you got in Morocco and they make your balls peak out just so and it’s really embarrassing.

What must the other person be thinking? Here you are, pouring out your heart and soul into a lame little …

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Poor thing

Friday, September 16th, 2005

Poor Alan T. I am outside the usual club and someone presented him with a firemans hat. He’s wearing it and strutting around flamboyantly while digital cameras flash. He’s a clown. Outrageously gay in a time when being gay isn’t as funny as it once was. A cautionary tale for those who have a granule of talent and the ability to be outrageous. What a life.

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Oh

Monday, September 12th, 2005

A few hours ago it was 9/11 again. I didn’t say anything about it. I barely even thought about it.

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Shop and compare BEFORE you buy!

Friday, September 2nd, 2005

Is it strange that the television commercial with Captain Kirk trying on red high heels turns me on big time? I’m not just saying that cuz they play it 25289352 times per hour.

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Disgusting media

Thursday, September 1st, 2005

I can’t believe people are trying to politicize the horror movie chaos in New Orleans. I’m disgusted.

Well, except Condi at a play. While on vacation. While America goes to hell. Politicize that. Politicize that as much as possible, I demand it. That’s disgustinger than any talking heads blaming nature on congress. Condi is a foul, witch-mugwump of a whore and deserves to be down there wading cunt-deep in the corpsey, shit-stinking swill that is now the French Quarter.

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Evolution of the epidemic; crystal is the new crack

Monday, August 22nd, 2005

Well if you’ve watched the news or read a paper you know that crystal meth is the “new epidemic.”

You see, every five years a group of hypocritical media demigods, corrupt midwestern police sargeants and power-hungry blazer-wearing politicians meet in a secret location and, while sex-torturing Polynesian boys and eating filets made from a broad sampling of the endangered species list, decide on an epidemic to create.

In the 60s it was PCP & acid, the 70s was cocaine, the 80s was crack, the 90s were ecstasy. By maintaining this wave of drug-fear they mutually ensure their own job security and, more importantly, an endless flow of government grants, hard hitting investigative reports and other miscellaneous endowments. It works well.

Amazingly, …

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Life in a suitcase

Thursday, August 18th, 2005

I am sitting on the runway at whatever Atlanta’s airport is called. The plane is just chillin. I am still trying to do my laundry from the trip to DR. I don’t know how people can travel every week as part of their job. It’s so jarring and confusing and time consuming.
To make it suckiester, I don’t really have a working digital camera these days aside from the D70 monster, so I don’t even have any photographic proof of my existance.
Oh well, at least I’m not on the runway in Iraq.

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Stuck in hell

Sunday, August 14th, 2005

I’m in the Dominican Republic on “vacation.” This place is a total hellhole. Imagine Miami, but with 30X more humidity (no joke), and 30X fewer things to do, and being unable to communicate with anyone because even the resort staff doesn’t speak English. The people who are here with me, stuck as I am in this forgotten third world country, are the most ugly, rag-tag group of overweight Latins and Jamaicans I’ve ever seen.

Luckily I signed up for the $65/mo additional Cingular International Data plan, which doesn’t work so I’m experiencing serious Blackberry withdrawls.

We went to the semi-luxury mall. After doing the calculations in my head, most of the prices were about the same as they would be for the …

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