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STR8BLOGGIN » Things that cause confusion or sadness

Archive for the 'Things that cause confusion or sadness' Category

Wilma, you whore

Tuesday, October 25th, 2005

For some reason, my buddy list is almost entirely empty right now. Maybe its because 90% of miami is without power. You’d think FPL would “get it” by now but alas.

As usual I am saved by the Blackberry.

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Things I’ve learned

Monday, September 19th, 2005

A good list, via Kottke. I don’t agree with some of it but they’re worth thinking about.

“everything i do always comes back to me”
“trying to look good limits my life”
“everybody thinks they are right”
“money does not make me happy”
“thinking life will be better in the future is stupid. i have to live now”
“complaining is silly. act or forget.”
“having guts always works out for me”

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Oh muh gahd I love being alive

Thursday, September 15th, 2005

What a story! Man tries to run over teen; teen, unharmed, dusts self off and walks up to drivers side door, then punches man twice in the head; man instantly dies.

Oh god hahaha imagine the scene! IMAGINE IT!

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The television post

Sunday, September 11th, 2005

I don’t post about television very much cuz it makes me sound like an irritable old hypocrit, like those old men who sit on their front porch bitching at kids for walking across their lawns and bellyaching about god damn motherfucking kids these days but he’s got two sandy-haired boys in the basement just like the rest of us, like that old man on Scooby Doo, the one they roped on charges when they found him applying a Dutch stretching weights to Shaggy’s retarded little brother Lou’s foreskin.

For instance War at Home. Give me a break! How could this beautiful creature swim out of this cretin’s balls? It’s unlikely folks. And his next neighbor is like LL Cool J or …

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New Orleans Obit

Sunday, August 28th, 2005

When the weather girls are frowning, you know you’re fucked.

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report from the field

Thursday, August 25th, 2005

I’m on the road, doing 60 in 60. The wind gusts throw my truck around like crazy. But I care so much for you readers that I take that chance. Wish me luck getting home. -t from 112 east

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Those crazy neighbors

Monday, August 22nd, 2005

As I was coming home I heard something like this:

*loud thud* *child screaming like it was being killed* *pause ……* *loud thud* *child screaming like it was being killed*

I was going to listen for a few minutes to see what was up, but I realized that I had to rush in to capture my epidemic epiphany, which turned into an essay, which you are about to have the displeasure of reading, and besides, who knows if maybe she was being beaten cuz she *started* crying, and I had just missed that first part. I mean if she was screaming and yelling, and then they started beating her with the cardboard box, well she fuckin’ deserved it. I’m kidding of course …

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Oooh yes

Thursday, August 18th, 2005

Vindication! I’m in the Atlanta airport’s American Air Admirals Club and there’s a mortgage industry professional speaker here having a casual conversation with someone in which he’s predicting the implosion of the real estate market. He’s taking words out of my mouth! “Realtor-created false reality,” “unrealistically high loan to value ratio.” etc etc.
On a rare, non-negative note: Atlanta is a pretty cool city, based on my three hour tour, except for MARTA during “rush hour.”

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Craziest idea evaaaarrr

Wednesday, August 17th, 2005

Introducing elephants, camels and lions into the American Great Plains. Whoever came up with this idea should definitely write for Str8bloggin.

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You people!

Tuesday, August 16th, 2005

I go away for a few days and come back to find you guys fucked up the gas prices. Wtf

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